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Thursday, November 26, 2009

My Holiday Scribbles-11: Arranged or Not???

It all started today morning, with me just casually mentioning of two people i know who are into a living in relation.And it ended with me and my mom having a heated up discussion.Not actually a discussion,more of a speech by my mom ,flaunting the pros of indian culture,arranged marriages ,family on and so forth.

I have a friend who had a perfectly arranged marriage but went into divorce within one year of the marriage.But my friend is alright, since the involved parents support is there .A divorce of an arranged marriage ,of no fault of yours and be sure you can fall back upon your family to support you.After all,you just went by their choice.

The second person I know is having a living in and I should say is happily "living in".As far as I know,for them the important part is to be together,to know each other better and to share their life before getting into a legally bonded relationship,which they think will be very hard to break,god forbid if such a situation arises.They face those terrible looks by the not so open minded people around them,but they dare and have got the guts to live by throwing cautions to wind.

Two different scenarios and two different sets of people.

The system of arranged marriages does not offer a surety or guarantee of 100 percent that you will have a safe and secured life.But still ,it prevails and is a safe option for many.

In India ,they say marriage is a communion between not only two people but also two families.Whatever happens,be sure your family will be there for you always.

But you take a decision and you marry somebody of your will and wish or if you have a live in,then be sure to face the drama and chaos.

I personally do not have anything against Indian culture.I respect our culture,our society and our values.But I also think,every individual should be given the option of choices and the right to his life,as long as he/she doesn't turn antisocial and harm everyone around.

Whatever or however,its our own life.And all that matters is whatever your decision, at the end of the day,you should be truly happy...

So arranged or not??the debate continues......


  1. Well it depends on the person...if he is in love with someone...then surely u can make up love-turned-arranged-marriage.But if there is no one in his/her life i guess arrange marriage is a good bet!! :)

    The debate still continues..... lolzzz

  2. trying to arrange love.. sometimes w do it and sometimes they

  3. well "living in" is just a excuse to, u know what..and then ur statement of getting parents support in arranged marriage is certainly debatable....but I am in support of arranged marriage, not because I think outdated, but coz when u choose someone u certainly can spend sometime together and then choose to go which way u want to go....after all we dont "arrange" marry coz we get parents support in crisis. So for me if u are ready for commitment and atleast try and work on ur relationship, it is bound to succeed...

  4. @soin:love cant b arranged..

  5. @ vishal:living in is not jus an excuese to "that" said above..different ppl.different perspectives..

  6. i don't et this cultural debate thing ever....the culture is all about representation of way of living the life of a certain group....why are we even comparing them if the individuals involved are of th different backgrounds and mindset...

    Anyways its my first time here....grt blog!!